Clear, calm, laser-focused in a job interview
As career coach I am often confronted with the question of how you can be and stay your authentic and clear self in a job interview, be impactful in the middle of a potentially stressful situation, facing both chance and risk of denial.
You hold two keys to success in your hands!
Follow a clear-cut process to step up fully with your personality and expertise and activate your mental strength to be be resilient under stress.
Key 1 – The process part is a path of exploration, analysis and focus ahead of the interview. It’s about you, your passion and your USP for the market and the specific job in front of you. There are 3 leading questions:
What is your „I want …“, your values and goals?
What is your „I can …“ – your expertise and your success stories?
What is your „hitpoint and sweet spot …“ – your why this job and why this company?
This clarity gives you confidence and impact in how you step up and it makes you believable having matching stories and successes to tell.
Key 2 – Your mental strength is to step up with clarity and calmness in the challenging context of a job interview and recover quickly when you are hijacked by stress
Does any of the following scenario and self-sabotaging mindchatter sound familiar?
Before the interview: “I want this job so much. I am afraid I am blocked tomorrow and will forget what I want to say.” “If I lose, I will be in trouble. I need this job so much.“ „Am I good enough?” “What if they ask why I have left my old job. I am afraid my emotions come up again.”
During the interview: “This HR-executive looks so puzzled. I seem to have given the wrong answer.” “I am so nervous, my voice trembles.” “Shit, I forgot an important info.” “I hear myself speaking and I don’t seem to come to the point.” “I am tense and not my usual self.”
If you are in that mindset of negative emotions you are in the stress part of your brain and have no access to your full potential, your creativity, clarity and to calm laser-focused action.
What now!
I recommend highly effective exercises to both activate your mental fitness muscle before the event and to recover quickly in case of stress hijacking during the event. These tools are from Positive Intelligence by Shirzad Chamine.
- Preempt your saboteurs:
Anticipate the interview and your possible self-sabotaging reaction; Pause and breathe. Then imagine yourself reacting calm and clear and stepping up your best self.
What is fascinating: our brain does not differentiate between real and imagined. When you imagine the positive process, the same neuro-circuitry pathway is activated as during a real success experience. - Activate your mental fitness muscle:
This can be used before the situation to gain energy and focus and in the stress situation to quickly calm down and recover.
What is fascinating: the little exercises, called PQ reps, only take 10 seconds each and they don’t need a quiet solitary place to practice. Do it in the middle of the hustle-bustle of life and if needed during a stress hijacking:
The secret is to actively focus on your sensations. By that you stop your mind jumping around and instead focus on one physical sense. You can feel the effect immediately. If in that moment you were under a MRI you would also get the scientific proof that your stress center is quieted down and your sage creative part of the brain is activated.
Here are two of many variations you can do
- PQ rep using your sense of touch
Touch one device (pen, paper, coffee cup, glass of water) in front of you and really feel the temperature, texture and sensations on your finger tips. Maybe move your finger tips slowly so you can feel more sensations.
Great Job! - PQ rep using breath
Take a couple of deep breaths. Now let your breath settle into its normal mode. Feel the rising and falling of your chest and stomach with each breath. Notice the temperature of air as it enters your nostrils and the temperature of air as it exits your nostrils.
Great job!
If you do PQ reps regularly during the day, you can continously build up your mental muscle.
Explore further possibilities with Mental Fitness – how to sustainably train and build up your mental strength, to be resilient facing any challenges and setbacks and recover quicker – for more click here
You have questions around impactful job interviews and you want to learn more about a successful job shift:
Interested in a free coaching session with me?
Just book your 30 minute appointment in my calendly:
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Why does negative drag us down more than positive uplifts us?
And why is it so critical for us to have a minimum ratio of 3 to 1 positive versus negative?
If you are above this ratio you are uplifted by a vortex of positivity and if you are below it you are feeling continually dragged down by a vortex of negativity. Thank you Shirzad Chamine for compiling relevant research on this 3 to 1 ratio in your book “Positive Intelligence” and adding your own studies of the PQ vortex for describing this energetic phenomenon.
What has evolution to do with it?
Basically, our brain spirals on the negative as well as on the positive. The reason why our brain boosts the negative and why you need 3 positives to counteract 1 negative is that due to evolution our brain holds on to and amplifies the negative far more than the positive. Being aware and remembering details of dangerous animals was much more important for our ancestors than remembering a beautiful flower.
What can we do to be overall more uplifted than dragged down?
We cannot change our circumstances. What we can do is be aware and consciously shift our perspective and outlook on life. This has a significant impact on our performance and well-being. As a consequence we are more calm, focused and curious and less anxious, hectic and stressed.
Make this a habit:
The minimum of 3/1 ratio should be maintained both inside and outside your mind – in the form of thoughts in your head and also externally keeping a 3/1 ratio of positive to negative interactions in relationships that matter to you. So pay attention to when you have negative thoughts or emotions inside your head. These are moments when your mind feels stress, anxiety, anger, disappointment, stress, blame, guilt, shame, self-doubt, regret and so on. These moments might happen in reaction to yourself, to others or to circumstances. Maybe you are beating yourself up for a recent failure, or you are blaming your partner or colleague for not acting the way you want. Or maybe you feel helpless and angry because of events you cannot influence. When you notice that, counter that by commanding your mind to come up with at least 3 positives. They don’t have to be big or complicated things.
Are you open for a little exercise to train it?
Aim to 3/1 ratio in your mind:
Close your eyes.
Let’s think positive using perspective. Bring to mind something that has been bothering you.
Let’s think at least of a couple of possible gifts. First: to have the situation not bother you as much, what strength do you need to grow. Maybe it’s about being more empathetic towards yourself or the other? So bringing compassion to yourself could be one gift.
Be curious about what you have learnt. How could that help you handle an even bigger challenge. What challenge might that be? Create a learning could be a second gift.
Can you think about a third possible gift? What else is crossing your mind, that you are grateful for? There are often so many gifts here and now, if you really think about it.
… Open your eyes when you are ready.
And you can do the same in your surrounding
Aim for 3/1 ratio in relationships:
It takes 3 positive interactions to neutralize 1 negative interactions.
Think about it when you meet people. Sometime a smile, a positive word, a personal question or even small acknowledgments change a lot!
I hope this article was interesting for you. If you are interested to learn more about mental fitness and how to train it, feel free to contact me:
And if you want to know your own PQ score: do the free assessment: https://key4c.com/en/mental-fitness/#PQSCORE
The Author:
Dr. Uta Barbara Nachbaur an executive and career coach and trainer, is specialized in leadership, mental fitness, communication, conflict and intercultural navigation.
I would love to read your comments
Upcoming PQ Events with Uta Nachbaur
There are no upcoming events at this time.
Can your perspective influence your energy and your performance?
How can our perspective on us and on our work environment influence our results and relationships?
After one year of Covid and lockdown how are you looking on what has been happening and how do you feel mentally?
I myself started off last year planning short-term and solving momentary problems like how to shift on-site coaching and training into the virtual world and how to balance business, homeschooling, familiy and partnership.
Sometimes I felt strong and able and sometimes simply being pushed and driven. Sometimes I saw myself at the steering wheel and sometimes I saw myself being tossed around not knowing where to turn next. This situation also influenced my thoughts, emotions and how I reacted on others and on situations.
Not feeling in control of my emotional state and my thoughts wasn’t me. At that time I came across a mental fitness training program. I have studied it and practice it since with great impact. Mental strength according to Positive Intelligence founder Shirzad Chamine is „the ability of your mind to manage your thoughts, emotions and actions in a positive and constructive way when being faced with difficult situations.“
Here are some ahas and quick wins for you to use right away:
Our brain is sometimes our enemy and sometimes our friend:
In 2005, the National Science Foundation published an article summarizing research on human thoughts per day. It found out that the average person has about 12.000 to 60.000 thoughts per day. Of those thousands of thoughts, 80% were negative, and 95% were exactly the same repetitive thoughts as the day before. So one of the tendencies of our mind is to focus on the negative and even repeat the negative stuff. There was another study of 2005 from Cornell Universtiy. Scientists had found out that 85% of what we worry about never happens. And from the 15% of the worries that did happen 79% could either be handled a lot better than expected, or the difficulty granted them a highly valuable learning. All in all, the conclusion is that 97% of our worries are baseless and result from an unfounded pessimistic perception.
As our fears often sneak in unconsciously, is there a way to control those unproductive thoughts and emotions?
Become aware of your mental traps and intercept your saboteurs:
The first step is become aware when those saboteurs turn up causing negative thoughts and emotions. If you can label them, you can control them and get rid of them. That’s why it is highly relevant to become aware of the assumptions and lies they tell you and of the negative impacts these saboteur attitudes, thoughts and emotions have on yourself and others. This helps unmask and dismiss them.
To only name a few: Do you know and recognize the hyper-achiever in you or others telling that you must be best to be worthy. Or maybe there is the stickler preaching perfectionism or a hyper-vigilant with chronic doubts who sees risks everywhere and cannot rest. Or what do your saboteurs want you to believe?
Stay in self-command mode
What is a good way out once you named and intercepted your saboteurs?
By consciously focusing on sensations you can actively shift from your saboteur brain where stress reactions reside to your sage brain where creativity and clear laser-focused actions prevail. By this, you run your brain rather than let your saboteurs run you.
Here is a little exercise to try out. It may seem silly and it is highly impactful, as personal experience shows and research proves. You can use your sense of touch to activate your self-command:
Sensation-of-touch-exercise:
If you can, it’s more effective to close your eyes whilst doing the exercise.Take a few deep breaths. Now gently rub to finger tips against each other with such a tension that you can feel the finger tip ridges on both fingers. Do this for ca. 20 seconds. If thoughts come up gently let them go and focus on the sensation again. Now touch the device on which you read this blog and feel all the sensations on your finger tips – feel its texture, feel its temperature. Maybe gently move your finger tips so that you can sense more. Do this for ca 30 seconds. Now open your eyes.
What do you realize? Do you feel calmness or less mind-chatter? How was this little exercise for you?
If you want, repeat little sensation-of-touch-exercises throughout the day. Whatever you do, just shortly notice the touch. Notice the texture and temperature of the coffee mug you are holding or the door handle you turn or the elevator button you push or the keyboard you type on.
This gives your brain a little valuable break and puts you back in the driver seat of your brain. So you are more in charge of your thoughts, actions and emotions than your saboteurs are. And you may experience a difference in how you handle the challenges of your day.
Shift your perspective
Being more in self-command shifts yourself to more happiness using the sage perspective of seeing chances, gifts and opportunities in all your challenges instead of judging them as bad and dreading the worst.
What does happy mean? Ask yourself: Have I felt mainly positive emotions in the past hours like peace, gratitude, empathy, love, curiosity, excitement of creativity, joy of clear-headed action and the like? If yes, you could say you were happy. If on the contrary you have felt manly negative emotions like stress, anxiety, anger, shame, guilt, blame, self-doubt and the like, then you could say you were unhappy.
Try out what you can achieve taking on the sage perspective of positive emotions, being sure that every outcome and circumstance can be turned into a gift and opportunity. Look at the events of your day that causes you negative emotions and just unmask and label the negative mindchat as lie and let it go.
There is one psychological rule
Looking at a situation, your saboteur perspective is „this is bad“ and your sage perspective is „this is a gift and opportunity“.
The answer to the question, „which perspective is true?“ is: Whichever you believe becomes true! It’s worth trying.
I hope this article was helpful for you to try out new ways to deal with your challenges. For me mental fitness plays a big role as I experiences sustainable effects of practicing mental training on my results and on my well-being.
The Author:
Dr. Uta Barbara Nachbaur an executive and career coach and trainer, is specialized in leadership, mental fitness, communication, conflict and intercultural navigation.
I would love to read your comments
Upcoming PQ Events with Uta Nachbaur
There are no upcoming events at this time.
Mental Fitness
Mental Fitness (PQ)
Spitzenleistung und innere Ruhe in Krisen und Herausforderungen!
Mental Fitness heißt, all den verschiedenen Herausforderungen des Lebens mit einem positiven Mindset zu begegnen und nicht mit Aufgeregtheit und Stress!
Mit Mental Fitness gewinnen Sie an jeder Stelle Ihres Lebens Klarheit, Kreativität, Mut und Umsetzungsstärke und gehen schwierige Situationen fokussiert, mit Festigkeit und Leichtigkeit an.
Mental Fitness kann man trainieren!
Ähnlich wie physische Fitness können wir auch unsere mentale Fitness trainieren.
Wie unsere physische Fitness darüber entscheidet, ob wir nur kurze Anhöhen oder auch Berge bezwingen können, so entscheidet die Stärke unserer mentalen Fitness, welche Herausforderungen wir gelassen, klar und kreativ meistern, bei welchen Krisen wir uns von Angst, Ärger und Unsicherheit unter Druck setzen lassen und welche Stressintensität uns total aus dem Konzept wirft. Wie wichtig Mental Fitness ist kennen wir auch aus der Welt der Spitzensportler, die immer sowohl physische wie mentale Stärke trainieren.
Mental Fitness Coaching und Training:
Sie bekommen einen Coach und Begleiter und das Handwerkszeug, um mit Ihrer Persönlichkeit, mit Ihren Zielen, in Ihrem Kontext unabhängig von der Stressintensität von negativen Emotionen, Kopfkino und reaktivem Verhalten zu Kreativität, Selbstvertrauen und selbstbestimmtem Handeln zu kommen.
Das Ergebnis
- Spitzenleistung
- innerer Ruhe und Wohlbefinden
- gesunde Beziehungen
“Prinzip Hoffnung” oder Wissenschaft?
Wissenschaftliche Basis für Mentale Fitness sind Forschungsergebnisse aus Positiver Psychologie, Neurowissenschaften, Kognitive Psychologie und Leistungswissenschaften. Der Psychologe Shirzad Chamine, Dozent für Positive Psychology an der Stanford University hat ein Modell entwickelt und durch über 500.000 Teilnehmer in 50 Ländern, über 100 CEOs und Spitzensportler überprüft. Ergebnis ist ein app-basiertes 6‑wöchiges Trainingsprogramm mit PQ Reps, um 3 Muskeln für mentale Fitness zu trainieren, das physiologisch nachweislich Auswirkung auf die relevanten Hirnpartien hat.
Erkenntnisse dazu finden Sie auch im Buch von Shirzad Chamine:
Ihr Weg zu Mental Fitness:
MENTAL FITNESS BASECAMP
In 6 Wochen mentale Stärke gewinnen!
Wie Sie Herausforderungen, Krisen, schwierigen Beziehungen mit positivem Blick, Kreativität und Fokus begegnen und Höchstleistung und Zufriedenheit gewinnen – in Business, Sport oder Privatleben
3 Schritte, ein 3‑faches mentales Muskeltraining:
- “Saboteur Interceptor”: negative Emotionen und Selbstsabotage unterbrechen
- “Sage Perspective”: Möglichkeitsblick, Empathie, Neugierde, Kreativität und klare fokussierte Aktion
- “Self-Command”: bewusstes Umsteuern von negativen Denkmustern zu positivem Denken
Das Mental Fitness Basecamp – damit Sie negatives Kopfkino kontrollieren, die Chancen in Herausforderungen erkennen und effektiv, klar und fokussiert auf Herausforderungen reagieren
Das Programm beruht auf Ergebnissen der Hirnforschung, die physiologisch nachgewiesen werden können. 6 Wochen Intensivtraining führen dazu, dass Nervenbahnen verändert werden, unbewusste reaktive Stressredaktionen reduziert und kreatives präsentes Agieren hirnphysiologisch nachweisbar verstärkt wird.
Wie geht das?
Das Programm kombiniert intensives Training, Input und Hintergründe aus der Hirnforschung mit individuellem Coaching zur Erreichung persönlicher Ziele
- 90 Minuten 1:1‑Coaching zu Ihren persönlichen Zielen und Erwartungen, als individuelle “Reisebegleitung” während des Basecamps und zur Erreichung Ihrer persönlichen Ziele
- Ihr PQ-(Positive Intelligence)Assessment und Ihr Saboteur-Assessment als individuelles Reflexionsinstrument
- 6‑Wochen Programm für den gezielten Aufbau Ihrer mentalen Stärke
- Wöchentliches 1‑Stunden Video: Input von Shirzad Chamine, der PQ entwickelt und evaluiert hat, englisch
- App-basiert praktisches Training: 5 Minuten täglich Kurzübungen von Shirzad Chamine, englisch
- Input: Auszug aus dem Buch von Shirzad Chamine, Positive Intelligence (pdf wird gestellt, englisch)
- Reflexion und Q&A: wöchentliches Pod-Meeting mit anderen Teilnehmern zur Vertiefung, von mir geleitet
Und wie geht es jetzt weiter? Schauen Sie hier auf dieser Seite nach den Terminen für mein nächstes 6 Wochen Basecamp
oder nehmen Sie mit mir Kontakt auf!
Die nächsten Mental Fitness Termine
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Saboteur Assessment
9 Wege der Selbstsabotage
PQ Score
Ihr Positive Intelligence® Quotient
Dr. Uta B. Nachbaur
Executive Coach – CPCC, CPQC, PCC
Mental Fitness Coach und Facilitator
optional in deutscher und englischer Sprache
